Father/Daughter Bonding

My husband informed me today that he and my daughter had a heart to heart the other day in the car. We decided to plant a garden this year and while I fully intend to participate, I informed my family very clearly that this is a family project, not just a mom project. That was all I needed to say for my husband to take the lead and make plans with the kids to get what we needed for the upcoming weekend, which was when we decided to plant. My son was a little under the weather so my husband and daughter set out with their list in hand for a shopping spree for everything we needed to get our garden started. Since this was our first garden we needed just about everything.

It turns out that this was much more than a shopping spree but a great opportunity for my husband and my daughter to spend some quality time together. Neither of them are big conversationalists so while I pictured a car ride in silence with a background of pop music it turned out that that was not the case at all. My husband filled me in on their conversation that evening. He was glad that things worked out this way to allow it to be just the two of them.

While he was caught off guard and unprepared to discuss acne with his teenage daughter he was glad that our daughter confided in him. Apparently my daughter asked her father outright if he thinks that her skin looks better than it did a few months ago. He was taken aback of course and he told her he thinks she is beautiful. He also told her that a lot of people have acne when they are young and everything goes away eventually. She went on to talk to him about how she feels self-conscious at school and when she goes out because she thinks that everyone is staring at her because she has zits. She feels that she is the only one of her friends that has acne and she doesn’t really talk to them about it because they don’t understand.

My husband told her that how she is feeling is normal and that she is lucky to have me in her corner and that I have been working hard to help her find the right treatments that will help her acne go away. (No pressure on me or anything). She told him that she knows she is lucky to have me helping her and that sometimes she gets irritated and takes it out on me but she doesn’t mean to. This was helpful for me to know and I am glad that my husband shared it with me. There was more to the conversation but my husband shared with me the things he knew I needed to hear.

I have no intention of telling my daughter that I know about any of what she said to her father but it did help me to know that she does appreciate things and knows that she can confide in both of us about how she is feeling. Turns out planting a garden had far better benefits than just having fresh vegetables.

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