Getting a Break

The business of the holidays is actually giving me a break from my own obsession with my daughter’s acne. I go through these spurts where I am completely obsessed with researching acne treatments, causes and cures, and then it seems as quickly as I have become obsessed, I back off and don’t pay attention enough to what she is going through. I have a little battle going on with myself about how much attention to give this acne thing. It seems that my obsession kicks in a little bit stronger when the treatments turn out to be ineffective. Two months into Proactiv without results puts me in a bit of a panic mode. I feel the internal pressure to start looking towards the next treatment on the list.

I have to admit that going to the dermatologist was helpful, not so much for acne reasons, but for me to now have someone to rely on to have the answers when I don’t. I feel like I am responsible for fixing her acne and when I can’t I feel like I am letting her down. I think of the dermatologist as my new partner in curing her acne.

The doctor has asked us to continue with our current regime at least until the next appointment. This directive from a professional does take a great deal of pressure off of me. Rather than beginning to search for the next great acne cure, I can get some holiday shopping done; guilt free.  The holidays offer an added break for me right now. I find that I am on my laptop looking up gift ideas and recipes rather than acne creams and sunscreen. While others might be cringing from the thought of the holiday time I am actually considering the chaos of December and shopping and decorating a break from my normal routine.

Her acne is not any less important to me now but the holidays provide me with a much needed break from my constant obsession with my acne research and determination to find a miracle cure for her skin. I can finally allow myself to get a break and enjoy the chaos of the holiday season without the pressure of acne, at least until our next dermatology appointment.


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