The Harvest Dance

I found the flyer announcing the annual high school Harvest dance later this month. Funny, the flyer was crumpled in the pocket of my daughter’s jeans that I picked up off of her closet floor one day while I was doing laundry. I wasn’t snooping, although my husband may think otherwise, I really wasn’t! I make it a point of cleaning out pockets while doing laundry because otherwise I may find remnants of candy, ballpoint pen ink or pieces of paper that are washed, dried and caked to my socks if I don’t make it a point of getting these things out of pockets before they hit the washer. I wondered how long the flyer was in her pocket and why she hadn’t mentioned the dance to me since it is only about two weeks away.

It seems like the masquerade ball was only just yesterday and my daughter, despite her initial reluctance had a great time at her first big high school dance. I worried that the acne would get in the way but she was able to hide herself under her costume. This dance is more formal dance, not as fancy as a prom but the zombie prom queen costume that she wore to the Halloween dance won’t cut it this time. I wonder if she is avoiding this dance because she can’t mask her acne under the white makeup.

When she arrived home I asked her about the dance and if she was planning to go with her friends. She replied “no”. Of course I pushed her when I asked “why”? Then she looked at me and let loose. She said that most of the friends she went with before have been asked to go by boys in her class. She wasn’t asked to go by anyone and she wasn’t going alone. She told me she, “didn’t really care”, and that she “doesn’t want to go to the stupid dance anyway”.

I didn’t say anything at first because I felt bad for pushing her to this point. I thought she might cry but instead her anger took over. “Who would want to go with me anyway, look at me, I am a zit face”, she said. What could I say to change the way she feels about herself? I just hugged her and she let me.

She hasn’t been too vocal about her acne at all since she started school. She doesn’t say much about much these days but obviously not being asked to the dance is bothering her, enough for her to talk to me about it. I let her rant for a while and then told her that dances are overrated anyway. I can’t change the fact that she wasn’t asked and I don’t want her to focus on it too much. I feel so helpless sometimes. I just want to make this acne go away so she can enjoy her teenage years.

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