Defiance Should be a Four-Letter Word

I really thought that when my son passed through his terrible twos I could say goodbye to his ‘defiance for the sake of it’ attitude. I can remember when he learned to say the word “no” and I wished I could erase it from his already short word list because everything would get a big, fat NO! After the age of two that response really loses all of its charm, so my son’s defiant resurgence is not being met with the same soft cajoling that he got as a toddler. I have to say I am really at my wits end because I didn’t see this one coming.

Of course, his defiance is much more sophisticated than screaming “no” in response to simple and quite reasonable requests, but it is nonetheless very aggravating. I ask him to start on his homework and he will say “I’m not ready.” What on earth is that supposed to mean? I mean really! He’s not ready! I tell him to take a bath and his response is “I don’t need to.” Where did this boy come from? The list goes on and on.

This has been happening for the past couple of weeks and I’m not really sure if I should expect a growth spurt or if this attitude is a result of the television he’s been watching or the influence of others at school. Really it could be anything or everything, but I need to remind myself repeatedly not to completely lose control. The other day it took every ounce of strength in me not to drag him up the stairs and turn the shower on him because he was just being so rude.

I feel like I’ve been duped because I honestly expected this kind of revolt from my daughter, but seeing it come from my son just threw me off course. It’s like I’ve been double tagged and left flummoxed and defeated by my two kids.

I’m trying very hard though and my husband is also taking a very active role in stamping this negativity out before it takes solid root. Maybe we’ll begin to see some small signs of change for the better soon, but it just goes to show that being a parent can be a really tough job some days.


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